Be Yourself, No Matter What


On paper 'being you' seems like such an easy thing to do. But believe me, I understand that it's not always as simple as it sounds. There are so many pressures that we have to face in the world today - and it can be a really scary and daunting place to be! Whether it be someones physical appearance or their personality, the media paints an unrealistic picture of what it takes to be popular or good looking or desirable. Personally, in the past I never really felt like I fit in anywhere (having anxiety doesn't help) and this forced me to act in a way that is not who I am, in order to be accepted into a group. Despite these pressures its always important to remember to be who you are because this can help you to be happier and just be generally a more accepting person. So motivational, pep-talk Jemma wanted to write a blog post giving you a few helpful tips on how to be yourself, no matter what! I'm still learning to self accept myself and some days are harder than others but these tips helped me through my struggles of acceptance, so I hope they can help you just the same!

UNDERSTAND 'WHO AM I?'

Take time to contemplate who you actually are and what sort of person you come across as. Think about your likes and dislikes and all of your little quirks and celebrate EVERYTHING - this is you! If you're a shy and reserved person or if you have a bubbly and outgoing personality - enjoy and accept it! This is what makes you who you are and although it can be difficult, learning to accept this can actually be quite refreshing! 

FOCUS ON THE BEST, FORGET ABOUT THE REST

This was (and still is) the tricky part for me. But this is an important step when it comes to self acceptance. You need to stop getting caught up in other people's perceptions and stop worrying about what others think of you. The best piece of advice I've ever been given is that yes, there will always be people who judge others (its unavoidable) but if they have a problem with the way you act or look that's their own problem - if they're going to live their lives judging others they will be miserable and to be honest their own personality will end up being quite negative. Don't live your life wearing a mask because you're scared of others thoughts - celebrate yourself and prove to them that everything that makes you you is worth loving. 

TURN YOUR 'FLAWS' INTO QUIRKS

I know, flaws aren't fun and at times they can be soul destroying! But in order to learn to self accept you need to understand how to turn these flaws into quirks. Quirks can be both physical and emotional, they are the unique parts of your personality and they make up the foundations of who you are. Be honest with yourself and others and learn to let these quirks shine through in your personality, because ultimately, if you learn to love these 'flaws' others will too (and this will make step 2 a whole lot easier!)

FORGIVE AND FORGET THE PAST

It's sometimes difficult to remember that your personality and who you are is not defined by a specific period of your life - you are growing and your personality and wisdom grows with every year and every situation you encounter. Allow yourself to forgive and forget moments of your life you aren't so proud of, mistakes are important and we learn to grow from them - we learn what we can and can't do and what we are capable of. Remembering that you are improving daily will help you to be a happier and more easygoing person and will honestly help you to be a emotionally healthier over all! 
AND... RELAX!

Relaxing and learning to laugh is important if you want to learn to self accept. Relaxing means not worrying about all the bad things that can happen in a social situation because to be honest 99% of the things we worry about don't actually happen - it's important to not focus on the negative as this won't allow you to show your true personality in these social situations. And yes, okay sometimes we do something silly like trip over or get food stuck in our teeth (we are all human after all!) and when this happens it's important to learn to laugh! We all makes these mistakes and no one is perfect after all!

STOP COMPARING

If you live your life wanting to be someone else, you're not living a healthy life and truth is, you'll never truly be happy! Shh.. its a secret but people only show you want they want you to see - the truth is, behind what they are presenting to you there is not a perfect world. Everyone has their own problems and NO ONE is always perfect! Don't strive to be someone else - instead value and embrace your uniqueness.

I hope you enjoyed this post and it helped you to be more accepting of yourself! Please share your own tips in the comments as I would love to know - I'm still learning to self accept and I would love to hear a few extra tips that you have used in the past! I hope this post has inspired some of you to go out and celebrate those little things that make you you! 


20 comments :

  1. Wonderful post, Jemma! Being yourself is so important, but it is surely not easy when society has these so called 'rules' that you may feel pressured in to follow. I have accepted myself and who I am kind of, still working on it, but I am surely in the better state than I was in 2014. :) x

    -Leta | The Nerdy Me

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    1. Thanks so much for the lovely comment :) I know what you mean, it's so hard to be 'acceptable' to society because the 'rules' are so unrealistic! I'm so glad that you feel happy the way you are now - that's the way it should be! x

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  2. Completely agree on all of these points and I can relate to the first paragraph especially. It's been important for me to accept the things about myself that others deem 'weird' but now they're what make me happy as a person. I really do love to read posts like these. Good work, Jemma!x

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    1. I'm glad you can relate and it's not just me! We all need to remember that the things that make us weird are just our quirks and that's a good thing! x

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  3. Great post darling! You're so right, everyone just says "be yourself" but it's not actually always that easy. I'm definitely still working hard on not comparing myself to others.

    Beka. xo | littleworldofbeka

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    1. Thanks lovely! :) I'm still working on that too! It's so easy to just compare ourselves, but we need to remember that it's good to be different and have our own unique personality traits! x

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  4. Well done and going in deep within your self for this post! Everything you say is so true I couldn't agree more but at times it's hard to forget the past. But I love this and hope you had a fun freezing time at the sea hehe ! Well done love at your age your such a deep thinker !!

    https://onoitafashiondesign.wordpress.com

    Lots of love always Nat xxx

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    1. Thanks so much lovely! I actually did have such a lush time on the beach with my lovely boyfriend - it's so easy for me to be myself with him! :) x

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  5. Such a brilliant post, well written!
    Charlotte // charlottespicks.blogspot.com

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  6. Love this post! Al the points you have made are so valid and relevant to me right now! It's hard to always be yourself when people have their own ideas of who you should be x

    Shannon | shannonkara.com

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    1. I'm glad you enjoyed it! You're right, it is really tricky! I suppose we just need to remember that we are the ones who make the decisions for ourselves - it's out life after all! :) x

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  7. Such a great post! All your points are so so true! The 'forgive and forget' is one that I feel I need to do! I think about some of the things in the past and it makes me super sad. But as you said, it's in the past and can't do anything to change it!

    TOUCHOFGUCCI // BLOGLOVIN

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    1. I'm really glad you enjoyed it! It is unfortunate that we can't change the past sometimes, but I suppose the only thing you can do about it is use it to look at how you have grown and what you have learned from mistakes :) x

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  8. Aww this was such a lovely post to read. ^_^

    https://theremightbecoffee.wordpress.com/

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    1. Thank you lovely! :) I'm really glad you liked it x

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  9. This post is such an important thing to remember, it’s so hard to be yourself when everyone’s trying to tell you who and what to be, and trying to shape and mould you into something you’re not. Number 2 is one I’m still struggling to master, though I’ve come a long way in the past year! I’m a lot happier with myself now than I ever used to be, but it can still be hard to remember. Number 6 is another part I’m really bad with. People are completely different and by that token, we shouldn’t really compare ourselves to other people who are so different you really can’t compare yourself! But it happens. I think as well with our kind of generation where we are all so caught up in social media, it's so much easier to compare someone's seemingly perfect lives with our own, and it gives others the access to judge us too.

    Amanda Jayne | beauty, style, travel, life

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    1. You're so right! It's so difficult to stay true to who you are when you think that you aren't good or enough or desirable (thanks to the media..) I'm so glad you've overcome number 2! - This is something that I find difficult too, so I understand how difficult it can be! You're so right with Number 6 and social media - I mean take instagram for example, everyone's lives seem so perfect and beautiful, because the photos are set up that way! But we need to remember that real life is never that perfect!

      Thanks for the lovely comment :) x

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  10. Really loved this post! My favourite part is the do not compare yourself to others! I posted a quote on my recent post about 'Performing Arts to YouTube & Confidence | My Story' talking about how this week I began comparing myself to others and got myself really down :( But found a quote that said 'Comparison is the thief of Joy' you have probably seen it before but I needed that when I saw it and this post has also given me the lift I needed! Loved it! I will always come back to this post when I need it!

    Elisharoserowley.blogspot.com

    Elisha
    Xx

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    1. That quote is so true and definitely something to live by! I'm really glad you enjoyed this post and could relate to it :) I hope you can get yourself out of this slump and gain more confidence in the future with YouTube and performing arts! I'm actually subscribed to you, and I've seen some of your YouTube videos and really enjoyed them - so you have nothing to worry about! xx

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